Where We Come From
& Why We’re Here

A Father’s Journey

Shad Kistler built Beyond The Shadows from the wreckage of the worst day of his life. When his son Malachi died by suicide in June of 2020, Shad found himself alone in the dark — no roadmap, no one who had been there to sit with him and say this is what’s coming, and here is how you survive it.

He had spent years in ministry and recovery work, sitting with hundreds of people in their darkest moments, helping them find a reason to stay. And when it came to his own son, the darkness won anyway. That specific grief — the weight of I help people find their way out of this, and I couldn’t stop it for my own child — is something only a suicide loss parent fully understands.

Shad knows darkness personally. He’s navigated addiction, depression, and moments when staying felt harder than leaving. That understanding isn’t a liability — it’s the foundation of everything Beyond The Shadows offers. He doesn’t speak from a distance. He speaks from inside it.

Six years later, he is still here. Still asking the same questions. Still carrying Malachi’s name into every room he enters. And still showing up — for his other children, for his grandchildren, and for every family who finds this organization in the worst days of their lives.

What We Actually Do

Beyond The Shadows is not a hotline. We are not a crisis center. We are a community of people who have been there — who know what it is to get the call, to stand in a room that still holds someone’s presence, to navigate the months after when everyone else has moved on and the grief is still very much alive in you.

We help with the practical things that pile up while you’re trying to breathe — funeral expenses, literature, follow-up care calls for children, siblings, and parents. We distribute the Still Here booklet, written by Shad from inside his own grief, directly to families in the immediate aftermath of loss.

And we keep showing up. Not just in the first week. In the middle months. In the years after.

The “Still Here” Booklet

Seven chapters written by Shad from inside his own grief — about the questions that won’t leave you alone, what grief does to your body, the people around you, faith, the long road, and forgiveness. Not a clinical resource. Not a pamphlet. A real voice from a real father who knows what you’re carrying.

It is distributed free to families at their most vulnerable moment. If you would like to support getting more copies into the hands of families who need them, consider making a donation — every dollar goes directly to that mission.